The 17 Opposites
The Get Real Manifesto is based on 17 tenets that offer deliberate alternatives to what most businesspeople are taught.
The Opposite organizes these into three parts and brings each to life with compelling stories and examples from hundreds of years of collective experience.
For
Example:
Conventional wisdom: Fake it ’til you make it.
The opposite: Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.
EXPLAINS ANDREA in the opposite:
Another early consulting lesson I was taught: Don’t worry too much about what you don’t know, as long as you stay one step ahead of the client. And don’t let on that’s what you’re doing.
This approach led to a lot of unnecessary anxiety and tap dancing on my part. It also subtly compromised my relationships in ways I didn’t realize at the time.
I’m not saying you have to disclose absolutely everything to be trustworthy and authentic—in fact, sometimes that’s the exact wrong thing to do. I’m saying it helps if you’re willing to disclose just about everything so you’re not wasting precious time and energy hiding things or trying to be someone you’re not. Besides, none of us are as good at fooling people as we think.
Being authentic is not only OK, it’s how you distinguish yourself from everyone else out there who’s clamoring for your clients’ attention.
The Opposite is a generous jolt of practical insights, inspiration, joy, and the kind of humanity that is vital to building relationships that matter.”
— Alan Gregerman | Author of four bestselling books including “The Wisdom of Ignorance”; Innovation Advisor to Global Organizations
17 deliberate alternatives to business as usual
Manifesto opposites
Chapter 1: Trust is non-linear and paradoxical {embrace the opportunity.}
Chapter 2: No risk, no trust, no doubt about it.
Chapter 3: Business is personal.
Chapter 4: The soft stuff is the hard stuff—master it.
Chapter 5: You get what you give.
Chapter 6: Change begins at home; work on yourself first.
Chapter 7: It’s your job to get comfortable with being uncomfortable.
Part I: Fundamental Truths
Seven (sometimes mind-bendy) relationship essentials that we all need to master
Chapter 8: Be human, please.
Chapter 9: Being vulnerable takes chutzpah.
Chapter 10: Mistakes are inevitable. How you handle them reveals your true character.
Chapter 11: Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.
Chapter 12: Keep it real.
Part II: Bold Moves That Build Trust
How to be more courageous in your client relationships
Chapter 13: Stop selling; start helping.
Chapter 14: Be quiet and listen if you want to be heard.
Chapter 15: Cultivate curiosity.
Chapter 16: Control is an illusion; the best moments are usually improvised.
Chapter 17: Humor and levity do more than break the ice.
Part III: The Hidden Drivers of Influence
How to make a bigger difference
Bonus: Besides getting all this combined wisdom, you get dozens of practices you can immediately apply in the “Make it real” section at the end of each chapter.
Andrea Howe has accomplished something deceptively difficult: making seemingly intangible skills concrete and learnable. The Opposite is an essential guide for anyone who wants to become the kind of trusted advisor clients truly value.”
— Hany Malik, PsyD, MBA | Former CEO, Suntiva; Georgetown University Faculty; Clinical Psychologist
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